Why I use the name Becca.

Im fortunate enough to have a name that when shortned is unisex, and there has only one time I had a moment of Gender-Disphoria over the use of my long format name. Generally I am unbothered by pronouns or my name personally. 

PLEASE NOTE; not all genderfluid people have dodged this bullet, so its allways best to ask and respect the use off.

However i still go by a pseudonym online, and to identify the femminine mode of me to friends. Why?

Safety is an important thing. And women may often use a false name to avoid stalking, women in adult entertainment allways will.

There is allways going to be a chaser that cant understand "No", the neckbeard that sees is as an object to possess, the Terf that wants to out us, or many other genuine reasons of safety from "I dont want my sides of life to collide", to just plain straigh "I dont want to get un-alived".

I chose the name Becca to keep this side of me private when I wasnt ready to be out. To keep this side of me hidden while I figured out my head. To keep any embarrassing fallout on employment. To avoid any stalking.

On a side note, the Rebecca Riots were an important part of Welsh history, when men in disguise as women became folk heroes to some.

Since then the name has stuck around, where many of the concerns have relaxed, I dont have anywhere near the levels of shame with family (some remains due to my own internalised self doubt), but its still not 100% safe, and peoples attitudes are still shitty. Just on shitty but improving direction.

Political culture wars have shifted its 'othering' onto us of late. A tactic used to stoke hate and division to controll the rage addicted idiots. This is a long battle of acceptence which will only be overcome when the barriers that divide us, erected by the bigots or our own self erected defensive barriers fall. But its not allways safe for us. Racism still exists (but not as much overt violence is seen), homophobia still exists (but people dont loose jobs anywhere near the scale of the past). But people even in "western liberal countries" still get fired when outed as trans. Still have malicous gossip in the office. Still openly maligned as sexual preditors by celebrities and politicians (statistically the violence is very much the other way). heartbreakingly, still murdered in parks and other public spaces. 

While i am out in close circles I know I can trust, even some "trans allies" have reacted badly to me when I told them. So Becca will be the name ontop of this blog for a long time.

We are a long way away from where we need to be, and its not allways safe, but little signs of the shift to acceptance makes my heart sing.

Reposted with edit for spelling corrections